WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE?

January 29, 2012

Well I finished the book “Heaven is For Real.”  (READ THIS BOOK IT IS VERY GOOD.)   My friend Amanda gave me the book a few weeks before Mikaylah passed.  She said it was really good and I was going to have some free time between semesters so I took it.  I didn’t realize at the time how much I would need that book.  It’s kind of funny that when you are in formal education you tend to start questioning your religious beliefs.  College is meant to make you think and to think logically about life.  Anyway, I had no idea at the time that Mikaylah would pass away just a few weeks after receiving the book.  I remember right after she passed away as Chris (my son) and I were walking through the hospital halls turning to Chris and saying, “It doesn’t matter what we believe, Mikaylah believed in heaven and she believed that when she died she was going to go there and see Grandma and Grandpa and be with Jesus forever.  She asked Jesus into her heart and was baptized this year and all that matters is she believed it and so it is true for her.”  I felt the need to say this because my son hadn’t made up his mind yet what he believes.  He doesn’t have a firm belief in God or in heaven so I wanted to make sure he knew that what she believed is true for her.  It’s funny that right after her death I no longer wondered what happens when we die.  Before her death I wasn’t sure.  I have had many discussions with people about end times and about where people go before the trumpet sounds, but not now.  Now I know that when you die you go to heaven with God.  WHY do I know this, because I have to know this.  I have to know that Jesus is taking care of my girl, that he is keeping her safe and that she no longer deals with any physical elements and is not sad even for one moment.  One moment changed my whole life. 

                Back to the book, in the book Colton (the boy who experienced heaven at 4) met a sister his mom had miscarriage.  I had a miscarriage at 13 weeks in 1999, I am praying that Mikaylah has met up with her sister or brother.  Colton also described a great grandfather that was in heaven that he had never met, but met when he went to heaven.  I know Mikaylah has met up with Her Grandma’s and Grandpa’s.  I remember last year when her Great Grandma Nelson died at the funeral Mikaylah wrote a letter and had Chris read it because she was just too upset to.  She said, “Grandma I know you were not ready to go yet.”  After all this happened I am glad that her Grandma was there to meet her and I bet Mikaylah was glad too!  I know that when we get to heaven Mikaylah will no longer be in a wheelchair, she will be standing.  I can hardly picture her standing, but the smiles that Mikaylah had here on earth will be dim in comparison to the smile she has there as she greets me at the pearly gates.  I have hope that I will see her again someday.  No theological evidence will ever change my mind now.  I am a believer.  I have to be because I have to believe that I will be with her again someday.