Friday, April 13, 2012

Road Trip

From Pismo Beach we moved on to Hemet to drop Chris off at his girlfriends house.  I got a room at the Best Western and Chris took the car so he and his girlfriend could go out.  It felt really lonely.  I couldn't help but think about the last time we went to Hemet.  September 2010, Janice went with Chris, Mikaylah, and Me.  We were going to meet Monique, Chris's girlfriend and family.  Mikaylah was so excited to meet her and after we met her we stayed in a hotel and we had a slumber party!  Food, candy, jumping on beds, giggling and telling secrets.  An all around fun adventure.  We also went to visit our cousins in Brea.  Mikaylah loved spending time with family.  She loved joking and being fiesty, she had a spark and spunk that would bring life.

Wednesday morning I went with Chris and Monique to Marie Calendars and we had a good time visiting.  I know its wrong, but I think of Mikaylah all the time.  When I was sitting there enjoying breakfast I was thinking about how Mikaylah would have loved sitting there talking to Monique and teasing Chris.  It's not that I don't enjoy myself it's just that I miss her being there and I know she would have really enjoyed it.  After breakfast I left for Yuma.  I was really excited about coming to Yuma, but at the same time I was sad because Mikaylah always wanted to come visit Aunt Pam and Uncle Sonny in Yuma, but I never made the time.  She wanted to visit Joey and Allison and the kids.  She talked about it and it just never worked out.  Why didn't I make the time?  So on my way here I cried, prayed, and listened to Mikaylah's music.  I could feel her in every song and I know she picked each and every song on her ipod because it meant something to her.  Towards the end of the trip "I Will Rise" came on.  http://youtu.be/IifTXVqpV-E "I will rise when He calls my name.  No more sorrow, no more pain."   She is at peace.  And she isn't upset that I didn't bring her to Yuma.  She's in a place where she is never let down or in pain.  At times I just feel alone and so sad because I am in pain and feel let down.

                                          
                                                       

Yuma is great!  I love the weather so far and the company is the best.  I am being treated like a queen and eating enough food for a banquet!
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1 comment:

  1. Alan and VonnaApril 15, 2012 at 10:34 AM

    Road trips can be fun, or sad. Mikaylah is always with us, but she would want us to be happy and enjoy the trip, and life. No matter what she was doing she enjoyed it. She would complain, or cry, or yell, but she enjoyed it. You need to enjoy your life. Mikaylah will always be a part of your life, and she would be sad if you are sad. We will see here again soon, some of us sooner that others, but she will be out running us all, standing straight, and being able to kneel to our KING! All without our help. We will never, in this world, know why we are called home when we are, but we know that God is in control and all things are in His time. I love you Tammy, and hurt for you and Chris. I'm looking forward to the memories that we are going to make as time goes on.

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